Konggu: Experience losses of mother, relationship and business. Indomitable aromatherapist Kat Lai: adversity is not the end of the world
Kat, the aromatherapist, is an expert in healing wounded souls with fragrance. However, she would never predict that she could be the one who couldn’t stand the frustrations. In 2017, she lost her mother, broke up with her lover and her business was in a slump. All of these happened within thirteen months and made her suffer a collapse.
Defeated in career and love
Seriously affected by the expensive rent and the change of consumer behaviour, Kat was forced to close down a branch. It was 15 years old and Kat had paid painstaking effort to run it. She could still recall the first day of the rental, when the premises was totally ruined with no electricity at all. Kat, with the help of her friends and family, put lots of effort to rebuild it into a beautiful place.
And everything was gone. ‘It feels like your son is going to be independent from home. Everyone knows it is a right decision. But I just couldn’t let go.’ While Kat tried to recover from the failure, her boyfriend suddenly broke up with her.
Mother diagnosed cancer and passed away six weeks later
At the moment, Kat was still fine. She rationally knew that it might be good to go apart if he wasn’t the perfect one. She could still fix her emotion. But all in a sudden, her mother was diagnosed cancer and passed away in six weeks.
Nevertheless, Kat’s challenge was never ended. Just right after her mother’s death, another branch of her company was forced to close. That became the last straw that breaks the camel’s back. ‘When my mom was gone, my heart was torn apart, but I could still manage. When the stock of that closed branch was sent to my home, I just couldn’t control myself. I could do nothing but cry. That was so stunning. I mentally broke down for two weeks, couldn’t do anything.’
Having more than twenty years of experience in aromatherapy, Kat knows lots of theories in psychology. But she couldn’t help herself during that period. ‘I rationally knew I could get well soon because I have learnt the psychological mechanism. But my heart was broken then. I had to accept that status.’
Get back on the horse and contribute the society
After all the experience, Kat has convened a series of charity events for the people in needed, including cancer patients. ‘Although I am not a patient, I know the feeling of the helplessness they have. (The beneficiary NGO) has registered nurses, social workers and rehabilitated patients to help the patients. They rekindle the hope of the patients. When we have hope, we can go forward.’
People see unfortunate events as psychological trauma. Kat suggests that we should learn to transform the event into chance. For example, Kat see the downturn of her business as a moment to transform her company. ‘God arranged this. So I must thank for the chance and accept the challenge. The most important part is to transform myself. Would it be a temporary downturn or a tragedy that would never be recovered? Your choice could make a difference.’ Kat believes that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Write a book to spread the magic of happiness
Kat named her skill to transform as ‘The Magic of Happiness’. When her mother had just passed away, she decided to let as many people as possible to learn this skill. ‘I wish people could gain something after reading my book. I wish that happiness could spread like ripple effect. You make someone happy and in return one would make you happier. We can’t change the past, but we can change the future by changing our mind today.’
‘Those 13 months should come to a conclusion. Life is like being at the coastal. Waves come every moment and we have to struggle, and finally come back to the land in one piece.’ Let’s watch this episode of Konggu together and spend the coming six minutes to learn Kat’s Magic of Happiness.
Konggu: Weekly project of the Oriental Daily, telling Hongkongers’ stories
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港故：年內生意失敗失戀再喪母 打不死香薰師：逆境不是黑洞 香薰治療師 Kat Lai